Yellow Nebula

I’m okay. I’m okay. Alright, back off already. You’ve told me now.

Give me some sp… 

She’s… 

Wait.

She’s… what? Dead?

Right. Yeah… got it, thanks for that, can’t wait to return the favour. 

No, no, I don’t need any—

Water? Sure. 

Hold on, wait. She’s dead? I must not’ve heard you right.

Uh-huh. Okay. I’m all ears.

You already told me, I get it. You’re just saying the same words over. I’m…

What the fuck. What’s happening here? 

Are you for real? Are you for fucking real?

What? What? 

Seriously, what?

Of course, yes, I’m sorry, yes. I’ll calm down. 

This is our home. You know that. Behind all this yellow tape and drama. 

Where is my wife?

No, no, no, no, no…

Why do you keep telling me this? Are you lying to me?

Let me go inside. I’ll find Emily. She’s in bed. Asleep. It’s late.

All these lights and all this shit outside my home is starting to—

Okay, everyone leave now. Now, I said. Get the fuck away from my house.

No, I won’t calm down. I won’t turn around. This is invasive, and you should be asham—

What the actual fuck is this? Not sure why you’re up in my face. I said no, I won’t turn around. 

Wait. Are you trying to cuff me? 

Not funny, dude. Not subtle. Is this a bad movie?

Okay, I’m chill. Don’t freak out. Give me a sec.

I’m freaked out. We’re the victims here. Me and Emily and baby Grace. What about that don’t you get? 

There’s a whole life happening inside that home if you’d just leave me alone and let me go inside and pretend this night never happened. 

None of it happened. That’s it. Never. I goddamned pinky swear.

You might not even be real. I might not even be real. A woman’s bad dream about her husband and her daughter.

If not, please tell me what I left for her still dripping on the kitchen counter.

D’you have any idea? Know the things we shared? Made together? Fought over?

Anyone here felt what it is to be clutched by a passing nebula with madness in its blackhole core? To be ripped from bliss and blasted into nothingness?

Thought not.

Do any of you even know how hard all this is?

Huh. Surprise me, bro. Asswipe. Come at me, dipshit. 

If I grabbed your gun right now, I’d fucking show you, fucking show everyone.

No, that’s absolutely not a threat. You’re hurting me, stop, don’t make me do this, just let—

________

Image of Smimm's infinite eye © Rebecca Loranger